picnic.jpgNews & Tips for Parents

Twins Helping Twins. October 19, 2019

Dr. Barbara Klein invites you to attend:

Twins Helping Twins

A workshop for twins and parents of twins.

Saturday, October 19, 2019
Meet and greet Friday evening, October 18

DoubleTree by Hilton Hotel Campbell - Pruneyard Plaza
1995 S Bascom Ave, Campbell, CA 95008

There will be a cost of approximately $150 to attend this workshop. We will be getting a special room rate in the near future.

Through interactions, lectures and group sessions, participants will learn about the healing power of support and gain insight into twin issues.

For more information email: drbarbaraklein@gmail.com

https://doubletree3.hilton.com/en/hotels/california/doubletree-by-hilton-hotel-campbell-pruneyard-plaza-SJCPPDT/index.html

Posted on Tuesday, June 4, 2019 at 09:06AM by Registered CommenterBarbara Klein, Ph.D., Ed.D. | CommentsPost a Comment

Cost and Consequences of Getting Along with Your Adult Twin

Posted on Wednesday, April 3, 2019 at 08:23AM by Registered CommenterBarbara Klein, Ph.D., Ed.D. | CommentsPost a Comment

We Still Look Alike, but What Else Do We Really Share?

Posted on Wednesday, January 9, 2019 at 01:58PM by Registered CommenterBarbara Klein, Ph.D., Ed.D. | CommentsPost a Comment

A New Book About Twins

CALL FOR CONTRIBUTIONS

 

Understanding Twin Relationships: An Experiential Approach. By Barbara Klein, Jacqueline M. Martinez, and Stephen A. Hart. Currently under contract with Routledge (Mental Health Division)

 

Share Your Twin Relationship Experience

 

Are you a twin? Is your twin relationship an essential part of who you are? Have you and your twin struggled with your relationship? If you answered “yes” to any of these questions, then we are interested in your story. We are seeking submissions for a book we are writing about twin relationships.

As twins, we know all about the endless fascination people have with how much we do or don’t look like our twin, or how alike or different we are, etc. But as twins, our actual relationship with our twin is much more important than these superficial fascinations. Many twins struggle within their twin relationship. And, to make things more difficult, we are surrounded by the presumption that twins always get along, or that we always see everything the same way. But, as twins, we know that that’s not true, and that often we have very different points of view, sometimes very serious disagreements, and even deep-seated conflicts that lead to life-long struggles, internal confusion, and turmoil. As twins, our psychological health is always connected to our relationship with our twin, often in profound ways, yet very little research is directed toward understanding how. Insight into the dynamics of our twin relationship are often hard-won because we have to dismantle the common mythologies of the blissful twin-bond. Twins are often ashamed to reveal that their relationship with their twin is less than these idealizations.

It is time that we begin to tell our stories of our twin relationships so that we can understand the actual consequences of the twin bond as we experience them throughout our lives. Our goal is to understand the unique closeness and struggles of twin relationships as revealed by twins themselves. In doing so we will help shed light on the push and pull of all closely and naturally entwined personal relationships, whether twin or not. We hope to reveal the actual joys of comforts that come when human beings are deeply connected to one another, but without the unrealistic idealizations that are the stereotyped version of the twin bond.

               We are interested the story of your twin relationship. We seek descriptions of experiences that will help us explore how twin attachment and estrangement are at work in twin relationships. We are interested in a wide array of experiences that includes both the struggles and the joys. These could include experiences of separation anxiety, loneliness, inter-twin jealously, ego boundary confusions, difficulties establishing authentic relationships with non-twins, etc.


Submission Details

  • Descriptions of your experience can as brief as 100 words or as expansive as 2,000. We welcome contributions of all lengths.

  • Essays should be submitted as a MS Word doc.

  • Include your name, email address and phone number with your submission.

  • Please include brief biographical and demographic information (age, gender, ethnic/racial background, place of birth, place of current residence, etc.)

 

Deadline for submissions is February 28, 2019.

Submit essays to twinrelationships@gmail.com

 

Note on Confidentiality

The editors and publisher will adhere to strict confidentiality regarding submissions. The identity of authors who wish to remain anonymous will remain strictly protected. Authors who wish attribution will be identified in the work.

 

About the Authors

Dr. Barbara Klein is a child, family, and adult psychotherapist and educational consultant. She has published 4 books on twins [Twin Dilemmas: Changing Relationships Trough the Lifespan (Routledge, 2017); Alone in the Mirror: Twins in Therapy (Routledge, 2012); Not All Twins are Alike: Psychological Profiles on Twinship (Praeger Publishers, 2003); Identity and Intimacy in Twins (Praeger Publishers, 1983)]. She is the author of the Psychology Today Twin Blog. She is a twin.

 

Dr. Jacqueline M. Martinez is an associate professor of communication at Arizona State University. She is the author of Communicative Sexualities: A Communicology of Sexual Experience (Lexington Press, 2011), and Phenomenology of Chicana Experience and Identity: Communication and Transformation in Praxis (Rowman and Littlefield, 2000). She is a twin.

 

Dr. Stephen A. Hart is Senior Lecturer in the Department of War Studies, the Royal Military Academy Sandhurst, United Kingdom. He is the author of German Weapons of World War II (Amber Books, 2018), and The German Soldier in World War II (Amber Books, 2016). He is a twin.

Posted on Tuesday, January 8, 2019 at 03:46PM by Registered CommenterBarbara Klein, Ph.D., Ed.D. | CommentsPost a Comment

Parenting Twins Is a Monumental Challenge

Posted on Wednesday, October 3, 2018 at 05:05PM by Registered CommenterBarbara Klein, Ph.D., Ed.D. | CommentsPost a Comment

How Serious Is My Child’s Problem: Whose Problem Is It Anyway?

As the school year begins to put expectations and pressures on students, parents call me with concerns about their gifted son or daughter who seem to have not been able to make a strong start. The very first reaction I have to parents is, “Don’t over react --- try to find out what problem you are actually dealing with.”
    For example, a frantic mother calls and says that her daughter is afraid to go to school. When she finally gets to school after intense stress and arguing, she sits in the corner and won’t play with anyone. This parent is concerned that her child is on the autistic spectrum.
    Another mother calls and asks what she should do about bullying in the classroom and on the playground. This parent is concerned that home life has been filled with chaos and stress and that her son has developed poor self-esteem and allows other children to taunt him.
    A dad calls. Yes, fathers are concerned about their children. His son is very fidgety in the classroom and cannot sit still and do his work. Dad asks, “Does my son have ADHD or is he in the wrong classroom?”
    My answer to all of these parents is, “Look at the problem.”
    Ask yourself : “What is causing my son or daughter’s unhappiness?”
    Look at the possible causes:
         1.  The teacher is not a good fit for your child.
         2.  The school is a mismatch---too big, too small, too rigid, too free.
         3.  Family problems are dragging my child’s coping skills downward.
         4.  My child is on the autistic spectrum.
         5.  My child has the social issues of a gifted child.
         6.  My child has ADD.
         7.  My son or daughter has a learning disability.

Consider what you can do to make your child’s educational experience more positive by:
         1.  Not blaming yourself, your husband or your child.
         2.  Getting to know the help and support you can get from the teacher and school.
         3.  Asking for evaluations by pediatricians, psychologists and special education teachers.
         4.  Look for educational consultants who can help you find the right specialist.
        
When you understand the problem, make a plan that you will amend as necessary because flexibility is your friend when your child and family have problems.

What helps no matter what is going on that is off kilter?
    Friends and affirmation from all involved are always important and help no matter what.

Posted on Thursday, September 27, 2018 at 05:35PM by Registered CommenterBarbara Klein, Ph.D., Ed.D. | CommentsPost a Comment

Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen are right, being a twin can feel like you’re ‘married’

Posted on Friday, August 31, 2018 at 03:30PM by Registered CommenterBarbara Klein, Ph.D., Ed.D. | CommentsPost a Comment

What Is Important About Twin Fascination: Twinships can tell us about close relationships

Posted on Wednesday, August 29, 2018 at 06:35PM by Registered CommenterBarbara Klein, Ph.D., Ed.D. | CommentsPost a Comment

The Time Is Now to Start Getting Your Intense Sensitive Child Ready for School

Getting your child ready to go back to classroom responsibilities they did not have during the summer is a critical transition. Preparing your children for work with teachers, homework and friends has a big payoff. Your son or daughter will not miss a week or two of classroom time if they are ready the first morning school starts. Here are some strategies that will help your family.

* Start putting your kids to bed earlier and waking them up earlier. Stick to the new schedule no matter what.
* Get all your children’s school supplies, lunch box, and clothes ready and organized to avoid last minute hassles.
* Take time to start talking with your child about what they are thinking about going back to teachers and school friends. Perhaps your child may not want to discuss his/her feelings about school with you, but I would keep talking about this important transition between relative freedom and school structure and accountability anyway.
 
Here are some topics/questions that are important for parents to understand/delve into:
1.  Have you missed school?
2.  What friends are you looking forward to seeing?
3.  What was your favorite summer activity?
4.  What was the hardest part of summer break?
5.  What will you tell your friends about your summer holiday?
6.  We need to get you to bed earlier!
7.  What new clothes do you think you would like for school when we purchase your school supplies?
8.  Let’s make a play date with an old friend from school.

Posted on Thursday, August 9, 2018 at 12:25PM by Registered CommenterBarbara Klein, Ph.D., Ed.D. | CommentsPost a Comment

Identity Real Estate in Twins: A Consequence of Inadequate Parenting

Posted on Sunday, July 29, 2018 at 01:20PM by Registered CommenterBarbara Klein, Ph.D., Ed.D. | CommentsPost a Comment